Thursday, July 23, 2009

If you Want to Win Back an Ex Avoid This Fatal Error

by Paul Lindquist

Has this ever happened to you? In trying to win back an ex, you've done nothing but run into brick walls? Everything you have attempted has backfired, and now you are in a state of frustration.

The difficulty in trying to win back an ex usually comes down to one critical factor. When you break up with someone you still love and want to be with, the other person is holding all the leverage. This makes it very hard for you to think rationally and do the right things to win back an ex.

Consider what I'm saying. If your ex knows that they hold all the power, they may milk that situation for all they can get-forcing you to do ridiculous things to satisfy them. If you've been there before, you know that satisfying them becomes impossible!

Okay. So, in order to win back an ex, you have to change the dynamic of the relationship and gain back some of the leverage. To do this, be cool with them. Try not to think much about your wanting to get back together with them. Instead, show yourself to them as being calm, in control, and okay with how things are, regardless of the outcome.

Direct your mind toward things other than your ex-like getting together with old friends, getting to the gym to lose weight, or maybe some charity work. Make yourself busy with different stuff so your mind will not be on your ex. When your ex calls you, be nice to them, but also communicate to them that you have other things going on in your life.

Let me issue a warning at this point. You may find these actions very hard to take. You might be tempted to want to do stuff for them so you can have a better chance to restore the relationship. The challenge with this strategy is that it is hardly ever successful in your overall attempt to win back an ex. Usually, they will either tire of you always hanging around, or they may begin to take advantage of your weakness by manipulating you. Whichever the case, it wont be good for you, so stay away from this trap!

If you remain cool and employ a disciplined approach, you should see your relationship with your ex change very quickly. They will no longer be in a position to manipulate you. Instead, they will become the one that wants to get you back. This change in the relationship dynamic should place you in a far better position to win back an ex.

About the Author:

Gain more information regarding how to win back an ex and end the frustration of your painful breakup once and for all at www.RestoreMyRelationship.com This and other unique content 'win an ex back' articles are available with free reprint rights.

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